The Lost UruSai
by PinkLemonade
Summary: Here's food for thought: If the Sanzo group could not go by jeep, and could not go by air, and could not go by train, and could not go by boat, and could not eat in the rain on a train with a fox in a box, how WOULD they get West? GEN. G. ONESHOT.


**This is all Koumyou Sanzo's fault.**

**Title**: The Lost UruSai

**Rated**: G

**Warnings**: Gojyo says 'hell' :x Complete stupidity.

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN SAIYUKI OR ITS PEOPLE OKAY THANK YOU.**

**---**

Here's food for thought: If the Sanzo-ikkou could not go by jeep, and could not go by air, and could not go by train, and could not go by boat, and could not eat in the rain on a train with a fox in a box--how WOULD they get West?

"Well... I do believe we're in a rut."

Hakkai laughed, half-nervously. Gojyo smoked, leaning against his weapon, looking sexy. Sanzo sat on a boulder, looking bitter, but thinking. Goku sat at the stream, using a makeshift fishing rod to fish.

"Well, how are we gonna save the world if we don't have any form of transportation?" Gojyo pondered out loud. He added, "I mean, by the time we'd get there by foot, the world would be destroyed and rebuilt again."

"This is true," Hakkai sighed.

Sanzo sat up. "I have an idea," he informed, sternly. His companions looked back at him, curious. He got to his feet and adjusted his robe. He pointed to in his group's direction. "You three! Do as I command!" he roared. Hakkai straightened himself, Gojyo laughed and Goku blinked. "You will all go fetch me all the paper you can find! Doesn't matter if its old or new, colored or white, big or small--all paper is good paper!" he ordered.

"What are you thinking, Sanzo?" Hakkai asked. He was indeed interested.

"No time to talk! Go!" Sanzo snapped.

With some coaxing from Hakkai, Gojyo and Goku got off their bums and went off to search for paper. Sanzo plopped back down on his boulder and smoked.

---

Two hours later, a gigantic pile of used, new, colored, white, dirty and clean papers stood before Sanzo. Hakkai, Gojyo and Goku panted, having gone to every nearby village and trash site back and forth for 120 minutes. No break, either!

Sanzo stood out of his pile of half-smoked cigarettes and walked to the gigantic mound. He looked over it, making thoughtful noises. Gojyo, Goku and Hakkai swapped confused, curious looks. Finally, after circling the pile and examining it for two minutes, Sanzo nodded. "This'll do," he said.

The three sighed, Goku falling back to finally rest.

"Now, new mission!"

Gojyo fell back out of horror.

"What now, Sanzo?" Hakkai asked, trying to hide his moan.

"You will need to bring me all the tape and glue you can find! Understand?" Sanzo growled.

The three were so confused, so lost, so in need of some rest. All until Sanzo rose his gun and they darted off in an instant.

---

Finding glue and tape was a lot harder. Though they managed. The pile of glue and tape combined was as tall as Goku. Gojyo dropped one last roll of tape on the very tip of the pile, before falling back tiredly.

"Is this good enough?" Hakkai inquired. He gestured to the mound of sticky objects.

Sanzo put on his reading glasses, leaned in to look over the pile, adjusted his glasses, stood back and nodded. His three companions smiled, satisfied. "Now I'll need to be alone! For at least two hours! You are not to come here until that time is up! Got it?" Sanzo barked.

"YES SIR!"

Sanzo grabbed Hakkai before he could leave. "Before you join up with those idiots, you need to get me one more thing..." he whispered.

Hakkai blinked.

---

"Anoooooooou... haraheta."

"You just ate."

"I knoooow, but... I'm bored, so I'm hungry."

"Yeah, this is pretty boring."

Gojyo and Goku sighed in unison. "Well, time is almost up," Hakkai informed, looking to the clock in the bar.

"I wonder what the hell he's doing," Gojyo muttered.

"Probably having alotta fun unlike us..." Goku groaned, blowing bubbles in his soda via his straw.

"Now, now. Sanzo has offered to make us a form of transportation," Hakkai said.

"Yeah, well, I'm bored. I ain't waitin' no longer!" Gojyo pouted. He got to his feet and marched out the door. Snorting and choking on soda, Goku coughed then chased after Gojyo.

Hakkai sighed. Well, by the time they got there, it would be two hours. So he paid for the drinks and food, then went after the kappa and monkey.

---

"Yo, Sanzo!" Gojyo shouted. He pushed past a bunch of bushes and low hanging tree limbs. "Are you done?"

"Yes!" came an annoyed growl.

Gojyo winced, stepping out in the clearing. Goku tripped out next to him, Hakkai standing on his other side. The three looked forward, and their eyes widened, their jaws falling open.

"This will be our ride," Sanzo stated. He pointed behind him, to a gigantic paper airplane, made up with all the papers, glue and tape. It was painted orange, with the words "The Koumyou Sanzo" painted in black on the side. Sanzo had asked Hakkai to get him paint earlier.

"Sa... Sa..." the three youkai babbled. They were stunned.

"I see you're too in awe by my genius that you cannot fathom words," Sanzo chuckled menacingly. He then threw up his arms. "Come! We fly!"

The three watched as Sanzo climbed in the crease in the middle of the plane. He sat snug in the front, obviously taking role as captain. "Hakkai is second in command! You're behind him, Gojyo! COME ON!" he snarled.

Like whipped dogs, Hakkai and Gojyo scrambled into the paper airplane. Goku pointed to his face. "Na, na! Sanzo! What about me?" he whined.

"You!" Sanzo hissed. "You will be the one who pushes us off!"

"Why meee?"

"Because you like doing physical things other than cleaning, screwing and hitting people!"

Goku drooped. "FINE!" Stomping in a fit to the plane, Goku clutched the end of it. With a growl, he pushed it forward. He kept pushing and pushing until, using his mighty strength, he shoved the plane into the sky. Hakkai reached out and grabbed his hand, managing to pull him into the plane before it could take off without him.

And so the bright orange airplane flew off into the horizon, off to the West.

THE END.


End file.
